The excitement of a new connection can be overwhelming. The rush of dopamine and other neurotransmitters can easily cloud our judgement and risk us falling into states of dependency if we’re aligned to that sort of behaviour -like having an anxious attachment style, for example-.If you’re like me, you’ve been there before. Losing yourself in a relationship isn’t a comfortable experience. After all, dependency is an over-reliance on someone else. A state that leaves us open to disruption in our own lives.

If you’ve fallen victim to this before, it’s likely you will again. Without awareness, that is. Whilst I…


One thing I continuously notice with myself is that when I am spending too much time thinking about someone else, my own life suffers. I mean, this is only logic. Time spent thinking about someone else is time away from the only place you have true control over; your own life and when we lose control of ourselves, we leave ourselves open to psychological distortions.

This is especially true when it comes to dating and relationships. No good can come from thinking too much about somebody you are interested in. Trust me, I have been there myself. What’s worse is…


On some level, you are an imposter.

It’s strange to hear, right? That maybe there is a legitimacy to your imposter syndrome. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it’s a sign of growth.

Imposter syndrome refers to the feeling of inadequacy in your abilities to the point of fearing others exposing you for the fraud you believe yourself to be. When unrecognised it can become a means for self-sabotage. A self-fulfilling prophecy rooted in lack of belief and a fear of others.

Whilst we could take the route of dismissing its occurrence as no more than another manifestation…


Procrastination gets a lot of shtick for being bad and don’t get me wrong, it certainly can be, but what if I was to tell you it may actually be good for you?

Well, it can.

Yes being a task-focused, goal-smashing, to-do-list warrior, can serve you well, but do you know what else can serve you well? An actual rest.

Maybe this article doesn’t apply to those of us who have real issues with procrastination; I.E missing deadlines, leaving things last minute, and just all-around having a hard time doing things, but for those of us who are more than…


One year ago I made a scary leap into the unknown. I decided I was going to start a YouTube channel and a blog as a way to build my self-confidence and get over my fear of self-expression. While seeming insignificant to some, to me, it was a giant leap for who I wanted to be. Years of anxiety, OCD, and depression had left me uncertain of who I was and what my path in life looked like.

Amidst all the chaos I sensed a yearning for more. I knew I had the capabilities to be something and do something…


We’ve all been there. Experienced the pain of a breakup or the realization that your attempts at trying to win someone’s love are futile. The subsequent process of detaching ourselves from them can be both long and tedious. It can be frustrating, even disheartening, to see a picture of them on your phone or their face in a social setting only to be transported back to the pain you once felt. It’s likely you still want them, too.

Despite months and months of staying put, the feelings remain. …


I want you guys to try something today.

My attention was first brought to this little exercise reading Eckhart Tolle’s, The Power of Now. One of my favorites on present moment awareness and spirituality. Whilst simplistic in its nature, its results and underlying neurology are so profound it’s something I can’t help but remind myself of on the regular.

So what is it?

I’d like you to take a moment, only about 10 seconds or so, to close your eyes. Then I’d like you to ask yourself this one simple question;

“What am I going to think about next?”

Whilst…


One thing that continues to fascinate me in my own dating life and psychology, in general, is the natural pull that seems to occur between those with an avoidant attachment and those with an anxious attachment. That despite the longing for deep connection, the anxiously attached finds themselves being drawn to individuals who simply can’t reach the emotional depths they desire.

You would think such a bond, almost magnetic in nature, would mean a perfect match and yet the resulting relationship is destined for toxicity. …


I truly believe one of the biggest mistakes we can make during dating and developing new connections is becoming invested in our idea of someone rather than the reality of who they are. Why? Because it sets us up for a plethora of misery down the line.

And hear me out, I use to be that person. Heck, on some level, I still am that person. It’s an ongoing challenge to not get caught up in a fantasy when I meet someone new who I like. …


For anyone who enjoys reading about relationships, is having trouble navigating the dating sphere, or is just interested in the human psyche, learning your attachment style will change your life. As social creatures in a socially demanding society, we are constantly being tested in our ability to hold space for those around us.

Attachment styles form the backbone of our adult lives and have roots in our childhood. It’s only logical to assume that the relationship we had with our caregivers during childhood is extremely influential on the way we behave as adults. …

Above The Middle

Joe Gibson. I created Above The Middle as a place for all things psychology, neurology + personal development. As a cathartic release, I hope my work serves you

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