This week, I made a mistake and I came down on myself like a tone of bricks. “Joe, you’ve been doing this for 3 years now, you should know better” I annoyingly utter to myself in various variations all pointing to the same conclusion; I should be above this. Above mistakes because this work has somehow warranted me immunity from slipping up or doing something wrong from time to time.

That mentality is so wrong. In fact, it’s toxic. I had to remind myself of this today hence why I am writing this to remind you, the reader, also.

Believing…


We live in an infinite cosmic universe and if that’s untrue, we certainly live in an extremely large cosmic universe. Possibilities are endless.

With that being said, you have room in your life to say no. In fact, it is imperative we say no from time to time. There is a lot of talk in personal development of positivity and acceptance of things as they are. In our acceptance, we can also accept that some things just aren’t a fit for us. Maybe our boundaries tell us otherwise. That something isn’t a fit and doesn’t align with our true wants…


The secret is, you don’t.

I was recently scrolling through tiktok -I swore I’d only use it to post my own content but it’s become my go too app for entertainment- and a video came up titled “sneaky ways to get people to like you”. It included subconsciously targeted tactics like saying somebodies name to make them feel special and asking them for a quick favour and it got me thinking… This use to be one of my biggest concerns. How to get someone to like me. Because obviously being myself was not an option. I had to mould myself…


A driving force of our unhealthy, destructive behaviours is our inability to self-regulate. When we are unable to resolve and manage our own thoughts and feelings, we will naturally turn outwards in an attempt to get our needs met. As is the case in most situations, however, the behaviours that follow often fall short of their intended purpose, causing more harm than good.

Self-regulating behaviours can range from withholding from texting an ex because you know it’s for the best, to resisting the temptation to relapse on drugs. …


I recently read Dr. Robert A. Glover’s, world-renowned and slightly controversial “No More Mr. Nice Guy” book and boy was it an eye-opener. I was already aware that there was more underpinning my need to be a “nice guy” than the innocence of just wanting to people please and this book certainly clarified these beliefs.

In reality, there’s been flaw to my personality. My nice guy persona was a facade. At least, for a large part. I still aspire to be a nice person but one thing has changed; I no longer wish to be nice to get what I…


If you suffer from anxiety it’s more than likely that you have an issue with control. It was a hard day admitting to myself that I was somewhat of a control freak but let’s give ourselves the benefit of the doubt, shall we? It’s understandable why those of us who suffer from anxiety also struggle with needing control. Anxiety is perpetuated by uncertainty and so certainty offers us clarity on the subject that is causing us distress. In essence, control seeking is just another adaptive behavior aimed at relieving us of our anxieties.

Issues arise, however, when this drive for…


It isn’t what you think.

I use to think the fact some of my love interests would take up so much of my mental space meant they were worth keeping around. That the fact I couldn’t stop thinking about them meant they were someone special. There was so much fault in this mentality it kept them firmly on a pedestal and me, hopelessly clinging on.

No one should take up that much of your mental space

If so, it is likely a symptom of a larger problem

You see, all too often when we can’t seem to budge someone off…


Our first instinct in the midst of hardship is often to try and fix it from within. We feel as if we have to be fighting in the trenches in order to solve our problems. I use to be one of those people, but not anymore. You see, the more mindful I become the more I notice how crucially devoid of logic I am during conflict. On the flipside, giving myself space allows clarity to emerge and with it, better judgment and better choices.

There is a good reason for this too, and the answer lies within our brains.

The Emotional Brain

During…


I don’t intend this to be a long one more so a reiteration to myself and to you, the reader, of the importance of trusting in our own journey.

I recently deleted Instagram and in hindsight, it was a brilliant decision to make. One I highly recommend for you to try out sometime. With everyone’s lives readily available to look at and dissect, I repeatedly found myself in states of comparisons to my peers -as well as people I had never met-. …


6 months ago I kickstarted a personal development space to help others whilst also embarking on overcoming my fear of authentic expression. That space included this blog, a YouTube channel, and since, a TikTok. Since then I’ve uploaded close to 20 videos and 35 blog posts with many more recorded/written that have yet to, or may never, see the light. I’m sharing this with you because if there is one thing I have learned throughout this entire process, its the importance of giving your mind a rest.

The stuff I speak/write about isn’t light in nature. 9/10 it involves delving…

Above The Middle

Joe Gibson. I created Above The Middle as a place for all things psychology, neurology + personal development. As a cathartic release, I hope my work serves you

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